Leg-Eye-Ugh co. (crappy skits)

[Redhollowlives999]

8/25/14 4:51pm
Active Users: GoldenPower89, K73SK, Dharthoorn, Cebolla (ZE-BOY-YAH)

NOTE: DV jumped in later so I'll add him too

The Insecure Overlord of Darkness Part 3: Enter the Inferno Was A Terrible Game
Episode 03:



[The crew is all chillin' and what not as always, having just finished whatever the heck they do in this facility. G-Pow is looking through ID's, trying to find a good picture to use during business hours, K7 is busy being spectacular, the new guy on the force is busy getting acquainted with every everything, Red's gnawing on a potato, and DV is figuring out how to enslave existence. Again.]


Red: Why won't this potato bow down to me?!

G-Pow: That's because it's still raw.

Red: Nuh uh I cooked it.

G-Pow: You lit it on fire. That's not how we people around here.

Red: That's not how you THESE NUTS.

DV: shut up

Red: You can shut THESE NUTS.

DV: tell me again about your two dad.

K73SK: Guys, please.

G-Pow: I don't like this picture of me with the flute. I want something... more alarming, something that'll catch people's eyes, draw them to me, and make them laugh.

Red: How about a picture of you naked. I'm sure people have done their fair share of pointing and laughing at you when you've been naked.

G-Pow: Are you implying I have a small-

K73SK: GUYS. NEW GUY, LIKE, RIGHT THERE.

Dhart: ^___^

G-Pow: Maybe I WILL make one with a naked picture of me. It'll give something for the ladies to behold.

Red: Behold his lack of THESE NUTS.

Dhart: Lively bunch you have here.

K73SK: Tell me about it. -___-

DV: i'll maek it rain flaming elephants.

Red: You already did that two weeks ago. Never even seen you so drunk.

DV: ****

K73SK: Red, since you're here, I wanted to test out the new improvements.

Red: Sure, go ahead.

K73SK: Can you scan people yet?

Red: The what to who.

G-Pow: I suddenly feel like my privacy has been invaded....

K73SK: No not that kind of scan. It's to help +Mods find out where employees belong. Like which department they're in and how their productivity is.

Red: ... I thought I had to do that manually now you're telling me there's a scanner for it ah the the the the naw GIMME.

Dhart: I see Oxford commas are but a myth here.

K73SK: Alright here goes.

[There's a flash of red light as K7 begins to levitate. The room starts to shake as a bright blue invigorating light envelopes Red.]

Red: Kinky.

[K7 groans as he struggles to finish his task. The big round table in the room starts to shake. Everything abruptly stops as K7 lands back down.]

K73SK: Nnnnope. Didn't work. Oh well.

DV: what no firewerks.

K73SK: I don't think I can do it right now. I'm still adjusting to the updates.

DV: are you a robot or something.

K73SK: ... yes.

DV: prove it break dance right now.

Red: SO. What I can't see users and guests nerkid?

K73SK: No.

DV: im not leaving until you do the robot.

K73SK: I'm not doing the robot.

DV: I'm leaving.

[DV leaves, leaving just the other 4 employees to rot.]

Red: Who wants tacos? I can use my weaker less godly powers to make fake money. And toast.

G-Pow: So you have Scam powers?

Red: That's not a power. It's an ART. Being able to say "yah got a booty so big I can see it from the front" and mean it literally, now that's power.

G-Pow: I'm gonna say this next time I see someone's x-rays.

Dhart: I like it here.

K73SK: Glad someone does. >:P I'm stuck with all the updating. And Red you know that's just not fair-

Red: Brb

[A red light surrounds Red as he warps away. He comes back with food. All the foods.]

K73SK: Nevermind. ^__^'

G-Pow: BACOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!

Red: *continues to gnaw on potato*

[Zup]

Weird seein' yer characterizations on here compared to elsewhere.

[Redhollowlives999]

Weird seein' yer characterizations on here compared to elsewhere.

Elaborate.

[deadly virus]

keep updateing this and ill update my story...........maybe

[GoldenPower89]

Lies ↑

[deadly virus]

possible truth

[Redhollowlives999]

Nearly 12 years later I've decided to update this again.

Also I decided that if I think somethin's a lil too much, I'll just put the [PG-13]/[R] thingie in the post subject. Or I'll move this to the adult section. Or I might do neither. Or both. I'm like that.

Also, just like everything I do, I put no effort into any of this and I wrote until I felt like stopping. So read and hope your eyes don't melt.

11/3/14 3:03pm
Active Users: Bill Cosby (holla at yah boi), Deadly Virus (he joined up later so yeah)

shut up make your own title you butt-burger THE MOVIE
Episode 04


[Red's just chillin' by himself in his office, sitting in a corner with a bucket of paint and a bucket of slightly burnt rice and ketchup.]


Red: That was great. Rewinding that and watching it again.

[Red grabs his brush and slaps a fresh coat of paint onto the wall.

Red: I love this movie.

[Just then an unimportant character steps into the room.]

Unimportant Office Bacteria: Mister Hollow, I'm sorry to interrupt but you've got 3 customers and a *this is the reason why he's unimportant* to do.

Red: Ugh, a pimp's work is never done. FiiiiIIIIiiiIIIIIine. Dork.

[Red leaves his office and goes to do stuff. First up was the customers or something. He looks to his notepad when the customers walk in, busy trying to draw a overweight moose and an overweight Lone in an antler deathmatch. He doesn't look up when the customer sits down and ahems at him.]

Red: Hello cumdumpster- oopsie I mean customer, how may I help you?

cumdumster: Hi, I was originally looking for K73SK, so uhhh....

Red: You thought you were important enough to meet the big man, that's cute.

the guy: .... So uh, who exactly are you.

[One really long musical showtune number later:]

Red: And that's exactly who I AAAAAAAAM! *jazz hands*

who is this sucka: So... does that mean you can help me?

Red: the the the the no. It's time for my lunch break. Hey Donna, I'm going on break can you bring in Virus to deal with the cumbucklers I mean our customers?

[Red gets up and leaves as Donna does the thing, customer grumbles about horrible customer service or something before DV steps in.]

DV: i'm here to help u b less fat

lol this guy is still here: Excuse me? Look, I just want some proper service and the last guy that was here-

[DV zoned out because prickly cacti.]

guy: and yeah. Look dude I just want some help!

DV: oh why didn't you just say so. i prescribe 2 doses of shut the f*** up, 3 tablets of go f*** yourself, a reminder to not forget that i don't s*** a f*** and a lifetime supply of get a new haircut.

fadnbda: -_____-

DV: sir please move so i can find another more appetizing face. cuz yours is disgusting.

[Camera follows Red again, so he knows he's gotta do something important now instead of being himself.]

Red: ... Lemme see... What else did that unimportant unreoccurring character say.... Organize.... Oh, the feedback suggestion box thing.

[Red saw a huge overstuffed box in the corner labeled "LAWL". He opened up the box and started reading.

Red: I recently signed up for your services and not only have I not gotten what I've ordered, you guys never took my money and when I try to call to ask I hear a guy laughing and asking me what kind of bread I wrap around my meat. I googled you guys and your services is really good and- UUUUGH words.I've read enough: Dear anom, maybe we just don't like you. Stop writing to us. P.S., if you're not gonna include a stick of butter with this statement then why are you breathing my air.

[Red puts the response in an envelope and includes a stick of butter before hearing someone's blood curdling scream in the distance, followed by the sound of DV saying "next plz".]

Red: Glad some people prioritize their employment here unlike SOME INACTIVE USERS.

Voice in Red's head: It's not their fault the road here is bumpy and sometimes they don't open the front door. I remember a certain someone missing a few months of work because no one would open the door for him.

Red: Tell that someone to lick these nuts I'm buttering up the things.

Voice: y butter

Red: Cuz someone will eventually make a lube joke. Or because I just own too much butter. You don't run my life.

Donna: Mister Hollow, you have a phone call.

[Red goes over to said phone.]

Red: What.

Guy: I know where you live.

Red: Then tell me cuz I forget.

Guy: Bring the stuff to the dumpster out back and find out.

Red: Wait are you black? Do you have MY stuff? What's the capital of Deznuts?

Guy: What? Uh, no?

Red: DV WE GOT FRESH MEAT OUT BACK.

[From the distance, DV waddles over.]

DV: wut flavor

Red: Pie flavored.

Deadly Virus: b rite back

[K7 comes back.]

K7: HEY! ONLY half the building's been destroyed this time. Looks like I CAN leave you a -- [someone screams in the distance followed by DV's "NOM NOM NOM" -- alone....

Red: Yup. DV got rid of all the cumdumpsters... no wait I mean... meugh.

[the universe blows up cuz science]

DV: *Still alive cuz immunity all forms of everything for ever* n00bs

[deadly virus]

i smiled

[GoldenPower89]

I'm a bit curious what the cumdumpster wanted...

[Redhollowlives999]

Curiosity killed the customer.